“What does a teacher do?” “What does a barber do?” “What are recent developments in Swiftonomics?” “How can the smoothie benefit me?” I pondered these questions only after LinkedIn prompted me to do so. Suddenly, I found myself contemplating the very essence of my own reality. How did I learn what I know? How does my hair go from long to short every five weeks? Could a trip to Smoothie King change my life?
If you’ve logged on to LinkedIn—the professional networking–focused social media platform that’s often the butt of jokes but that I’ve championed on this very website—you’ve probably noticed it looks different. Like Facebook, Instagram, and just about every modern website, LinkedIn is now decked out with artificial intelligence features.
Currently, the company says this is only available to English-language Premium subscribers—don’t yell at me, I get it for free—and is rolling out gradually to its global user base. LinkedIn’s parent company, Microsoft, has become one of the most voracious funders of A.I. technology, investing $13 billion in ChatGPT-maker OpenAI while building its own internal A.I. team. So, it’s no wonder that the PC maker’s social media site is chock-full of A.I. bling.
On my LinkedIn, little diamond symbols adorn suggested prompts underneath user posts—and if you click them, it opens up a chat with LinkedIn’s A.I.
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Many of the prompt suggestions are banal. I posted one of my own articles about the startup Anthropic and how its chatbot Claude claims to understand humor now. Underneath, LinkedIn displays the prompts “What is Anthropic known for?” “How can the Claude model enhance AI chatbots’ humor?” As a journalist, I’m more than slightly disturbed that LinkedIn wants to give the gist of my article for those too lazy to read it. But these are things people might be wondering.
I scrolled down. One of my former professors posted something lighthearted about how they find doing vector geometry relaxing. LinkedIn AI: “How can vector geometry be relaxing?” I clicked. A chat screen opened. “Studying vector geometry can be relaxing for some because it offers a structured and predictable form of engagement.” Sure.
I scrolled more. A colleague posted something about Google. LinkedIn A.I.: “What is Google known for?” I clicked and learned that Google is “renowned for its search engine, technological innovations, and contributions to the digital landscape.”
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The New York Times posted an article with a quote from a man with 14 degrees: “I believe that people are like trees… I hope I am a sequoia. I want to grow for as long as possible and reach toward the highest level of the sky.” LinkedIn A.I.: “How can we grow like a sequoia?”
LinkedIn is already littered with auto-generated suggestions for comments. But the new chatbot prompts are more blatant attempts to waste users’ time, keep them using the site for longer, and keep them from clicking on a link and leaving.
A.I. chatbots may be the latest fad, but they’re not making anyone’s life easier by polluting LinkedIn—unless they don’t know what a teacher is.
